The Mother of All Computer Columns

Alan Frayer, CNE, CNI, CIW CI, Net+, MCP

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Before you start to think about my vanity from this column's title, think about how the Persian Gulf War has affected our phraseology. Thanks to Sadaam and Stormin' Norman, the ultimate anything is referred to as "the mother of all" whatever. I've even caught Bocona talking about a recent rain shower as "the mother of all thunderstorms." Since my mother likes to think of herself as the mother of the mother of all computer columnists, I should feel justified in using the above title.

I've tried hard to keep that expression from my mind, but when I'm besieged with ads for "the mother of all pesticides" and "the mother of all drain cleaners" I've found it difficult to resist. Everyone's talking about the mother of all phrases.

Everyone wants to be the mother of something. It's the mother of all compliments. Even corporations vie for maternal honors. A major contender for the title of the mother of all mergers is Borland International & Ashton-Tate, who announced their intended merger a couple weeks ago. Borland wants to be the mother of all database publishers. Already well positioned for the honor with Paradox, the company spent more than $440 million for Ashton-Tate, gaining the rights over one-time mother of all databases dBase. The merger leaves virtual clear sailing for one of Borland's more ambitious projects, Object dBase, a dBase compiler expected to support both dBase and Paradox applications. Borland is also expected to continue development on both Paradox and dBase products.

Joining the fight for the title is the announced purchase of Digital Research by Novell, the mother of all network software publishers. Novell, as you may recall, was almost bought by the mother of spreadsheet publishers, Lotus, bailing out at the last minute over board representation disputes. With this $80 million purchase, Novell hopes to mix DR DOS with the Netware shell and come up with a desktop environment to rival Microsoft for the title of the mother of all operating systems.

Each of these merged companies can look forward to the mother of all battles for their respective markets. Fox Software has finally gotten around to shipping FoxPro 2.0, getting a big head start over Borland in the dBase-compatible database market. FoxPro 2.0 has been the greatly anticipated favorite in the diverse dBase battle, and so little information is available on Borland's plans for the dBase language. The newly merged company may not be able to save dBase IV, which has been slipping in the polls. Hiding in the wings is Alpha Software, which has moved Alpha Four 2.0 into beta testing. Alpha Four has gained big ground for offering relational databases in a non-programming environment, and 2.0 will improve upon that, offering network use and a script language for those who insist on a little programming.

Novell, on the other hand, is joining an already hotly contested race. DR DOS/Netware will have to compete with Microsoft's MS-DOS, Microsoft's Windows (while not an OS, itself, Windows carries the clout of one), IBM's OS/2 2.0, Microsoft's OS/2 3.0, Apple/IBM's Pink, and anything else that pops into this confused, volatile market. The company's success will greatly depend upon its continued hold over the networking market.

I'm not so sure I'd like to be called the mother of all computer columnists. When Debbie shouts "Mom!" would Bocona and I both answer? I think not. Perhaps I should send a letter to Sadaam and ask him to be less gender specific next time he makes one of those uplifting speeches.


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